They are only designed for one thing: To take as much of your money as they can. Never play the slots, especially the video kind, unless you have no desire to win. (If you don’t believe us, check out the Golden Arm statue at the California Club (12 E Ogden Ave) and read the names on the plaque, Japs will roll for hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours.) Shit happens so fast at these tables, you may actually never see the number be set. The big Texan-ish man will start with an insane amount of chips that will just keep growing and growing because the Japanese guy will be throwing the same two dice for hours at a time. Luck is very real here and they will suck yours dry.Īlways look for the tiny Japanese men from Hawaii (especially if they are carrying around little ceramic frogs and rubbing on them) and the loud-as-all-fuck cowboys with gigantic hats and bolo ties. They will sink the whole ship with themselves in it, which is what they’re paid to do by the casino. Another thing to watch out for are the coolers: When an overweight man that looks about 300 years old sits down at your table with about 20 bucks in chips and a cigar, run the fuck away. If you don’t believe us, just watch these guys at any table and see just how fast the dice change hands.

Never EVER gamble with these people, especially on the Strip. They will get extremely loud and rambunctious when they win a $5 pass-line bet (this isn’t impressive if you aren’t “in the know”).

On the Strip you’ll be surrounded by steak-headed jocks from Omahiobraska playing dice games with dudes in diamond-encrusted Scarface tees with teensy-weensy stacks of chips. The most important rule of gambling in Vegas is: Stay the hell away from the Strip and go to the downtown casinos.

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